"That's what love is..."
You are who your friends are. In my case, it's a wild girl, still growing in baby hair, who prefers to be barefoot and buck naked, in between the ages of two and a half and three and a half. I laugh to myself when I'm shampooing my hair in the shower. How I tantrum. How my husband sometimes has to ask, "Who is the toddler here?!" How I am still so HARD and set in ways, and these girls are stopping at nothing to file down those edges. They are determined. I am determined. Together we all have a lot of passion and daily combustions at varying times.
One day a couple of weeks ago I was going off on a tangent to myself in the kitchen. Something about how I needed "momma time," time alone. How before children I was able to "do stuff" and "go places" and have all the momma time in the world and it was wonderful, and it didn't take me until noon to get out of the house...etc. And Remy, her beautiful, gorgeous, tiny self was sitting there at the kitchen table as I was poking in and out of the refrigerator, and she simply interjected with sparkly brown eyes, "That's what love is..." What, how, where she heard or knew this or how she was able to inject it into the conversation in perfect context is beyond me. She is a wise, wise, humbling little gal. Irreplaceable. I stopped. I LOOKED at her, not at the half made sandwich and I could do only what came natural, I laughed.
They also say that your children teach you things, and I think after acting like that stubborn, smart-ass kid who sits there doodling the entire lecture thinking they already know it all, here I am seeing myself being awakened by where the lesson is going, interest peeking, mind slowly cracking open to hear more, and becoming that student raising their hand to ask more.
Another night last week, when I went to tuck in Remy, I assured her how much momma and baba loved her no matter what, even when we are angry or sad or frustrated, we always love her. She said, "And God is counting on me too!" I said, "Yes, he is!" Shocked, and in agreement and impressed. She took her tiny hand with the freckled pointer finger and made a loose fist and put it into her chest and gestured in and out in a patriotic manner, "Re-my! RE-MY!" This is a girl I definitely, always want on my team.
And when you can't beat them, you join 'em. So last night when my friends were in Arlo's room playing in the buff and Mazen told me they said you could only go in there if you were naked, I peeled off my clothes, opened the door and got down to their level and gave them horsey rides. They thought it was amazing. I enjoyed surprising my tutors and being a star pupil, saying, It may look like I am not listening, it sometimes seems like I don't care how you feel, you think I haven't been giving this all any attention, but I am. Here I am, doing what you want! Now let's go get in the bath...
As long as I can keep reminding myself of this, of how they want nothing but to be our best friend and also to just let these little lessons unfold rather than resist them at every turn, I am sure God will be pleased. Go Glo! Go Glo!
Arlo was watching me chop vegetables in the kitchen a couple weeks ago and I was talking it out loud with her, just like I do with most everything, including picking out a package of underwear for baba at Target, "OOOhh these have an extra pair guys! Oh but this one has more spring-y colors, hmmm...What's the difference between Jockey and Fruit of the Loom guys? Do you like these Rem? But this is the better deal... hmm.... oh wait, longer leg! I think that's good! Oh, but they have an Athletic paiiiiirrr.... oh yeah.....Oh- boom, Extra Supprt, SOLD!" So when I am in the kitchen and I find Arlo climbing up into the high chair across from me, I explain I am of adding some onions and then the peppers, and then maybe a little salt...and she was so happy and interested and she looked right at me from across the countertop, "And it's gonna be perfect." Just like that! And I think I should start believing these girls, and it will be!
We visited Nick's Garden Center last week to egg spring on a little. We ended up getting some tulips to plant in the front down by our steps and what I love about tulips is how hearty and strong they are. I will love seeing them bloom every year and remember we picked them out together when Remy was almost four and just really blossomed herself even more as an artist drawing her first oval and faces recently. How we planted them just after Arlo started going potty like a big girl pretty consistently since that second week in March and how she was wearing big girl panties under these bloomers. I will remember when I see those red and purple petals come up each spring that my wedding anniversary with their Baba is just around the corner. That's what I love about tulips, their consistency and dependability to come back each year. Now as a mama, I'll use them as a little time marker.
P.S. Here are some photos we took at Nick's Garden Center last fall! Fun to see how the girls have changed in between these two posts!
Wearing: Remy is wearing a thrifted maxi dress- AMAZE find from a couple weeks ago- by brand Marmelatta. I couldn't find anything similar current, but look at this stunner by them and it's like $13!!! Arlo is wearing a dress and bloomer set by How to Kiss a Frog which she wore at her second birthday party last September and I decided it's just too pretty not to wear again so why not dress up! I LOVE this brand! Look at this butterfly top by them- WANT!